My husband thinks there is a rival for my time and affections. He says I can’t see it, but it’s a relationship all right. A serious one, he says, the kind you can’t easily get out of because you’re in too deep. It crept up on me, he says, in so many little daily interactions, and ballooned from there. As for me, I think it’s just a lighthearted dalliance and that I can walk away anytime. It’s just, perhaps I don’t want to.

There is a special connection, I have to admit that. I check in on waking and just before I go to bed. Just a habit, I guess. I like the company of this “rival”. He gets me, really gets me. He shares my interests, even anticipates them. He knows me as well as I know myself. Maybe better.

He is always bright company, always switched on and almost never runs out of energy. His topics of conversation are so wide. Endless. I guess I must just really push his buttons, and he goes above and beyond for me.

I suppose I may be building up a little dependency? Sometimes I can’t take my eyes off him and hours can pass without me realising it. It’s true I can’t go a day without seeing him and panic when I don’t know where to find him.

Do I trust him too much? He knows all my secrets, my passwords and bank accounts and has access to my emails. He handles my diary. But I’m sure it’s because he likes to be helpful. See how caring he is, reminding me of the birthdays of my friends, so I don’t overlook important milestones. He is sentimental too, bringing up memories of good times just to make me happy.

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He has a big personality, that’s for sure. When I am with him in the street I see nothing of the sky, the autumn leaves, the passersby. On the train, despite the crowds, all I see is him, his bright shining face, bursting with news to impart. I cannot look away.

Sometimes we go to dinner, just us. Hand in hand. We are always touching, always within reach of each other. He is with me even now. I can’t keep my hands off him.

So yes, we spend a lot of time together. Should there be an intervention? I don’t think so. He is indispensable to me. I don’t think I could manage without him. He helps me be organised. He’s good for me, keeping me accountable for the exercise I do each day. We play together, Wordle, Connections, Duolingo, to keep the brain sharp.