The late Queen, it seems to me, didnât ask for an awful lot. She did her job with dedication and grace, lived relatively frugally (for someone in her position), exercised her judgment with kindness and wisdom and was, on the whole, a forgiving soul.
She was certainly endlessly patient with the variously tricky egos in her life, even when they pushed her to limits most of us would have found intolerable.
But the one thing she did expect, particularly from those close to her, was respect for the role of monarchy and the institution itself, and a clear understanding that neither were to be taken for granted nor, more importantly, exploited.
For her, being a member of the Royal Family was an honour not a privilege â and certainly not an opportunity for personal gain. That is why she was so widely loved and respected, and why the Monarchy was safe in her hands.
It was also why, when Prince Harry and the Duchess of Sussex declared their desire to stand down as working royals and pursue a life as ordinary people across the Atlantic, the late Queenâs one stipulation was that they would not use their HRH titles.
It was a gentlepersonâs agreement: no official documentation or royal decree was signed; it was simply an understanding based on mutual respect. Elizabeth II was very fond of her grandson, and he â or so he always said â of her.
She probably thought, having left him a tidy sum, which he inherited on his 40th birthday, as well as other bequests, he and his wife would neither need nor want to break her trust. Sadly, it appears she was wrong.
As part of her promotional blitz for her lifestyle brand As Ever, the Duchess sat down this week with the make-up entrepreneur and billionaire Jamie Kern Lima, who has a podcast. It was quite the performance.
The Duchess of Sussex's eyes glistened with tears of self-love as she spoke â without a trace of irony â about her time âin the trenchesâ on Jamie Kern Lima's podcast
Lima âsharedâ an image of a small wicker basket from Meghan's lifestyle brand, As Ever, accompanied by a note that said: âWith the compliments of HRH The Duchess of Sussexâ
Against a background of tinkly piano music, Lima lapped up the self-satisfied drivel with an expression of beatific smuggery reminiscent of a giant toad who has just swallowed the biggest, fattest, juiciest fly. There were a lot of blurry cutaways of the Duchess throwing her head back in joyous laughter, or rolling her eyes in faux self-deprecation. Those same eyes glistened with tears of self-love as she spoke â without a trace of irony â about her time âin the trenchesâ (aka living in a rather nice house on the Windsor estate with not a single money worry, occasionally showing up for things in a nice dress and a tiara).
Neither of them wore make-up, presumably so their authenticity can be as visible as their pores. As a study in lack of self-awareness, itâs unintentionally hilarious â and useful should you ever find yourself in need of an emetic.
So far, so predictable. But then, presumably overwhelmed by emotion in the face of such unalloyed joy and wisdom, Lima âsharedâ an image of a small wicker basket containing two tubs of ice-cream, a sprig of mint and a pot of the Duchessâs jam, accompanied by a note that said: âWith the compliments of HRH The Duchess of Sussexâ.
Now, if that doesnât come under the heading of âusing a Royal title for commercial purposesâ, I donât know what does. Sources âclose to the coupleâ have argued that, since the hamper was a personal gift, it does not count. But really, surely, thatâs just splitting hairs? (Not to mention that imposing your HRH on to friends displays a Prince Andrew-level of pomposity). Simply, the title is not theirs to use. So why are they using it? More to the point, why do these two think they can get away with this? Do they think people are stupid? Does the Duchess think we simply wonât notice? And how much longer is she going to continue to cast herself as a victim of the British Monarchy â while all the time using it to flog her brand?
For this is by no means the first time. Despite apparently despising everything the Royal Family stands for, they named their daughter Lilibet, which was the late Queenâs nickname as a child, just to cement that connection. They even went so far as to register domain names for âLilibetDiana.comâ and âLiliDiana.comâ before the childâs birth.
Oh, and letâs not forget the telling-off that the Duchess gave to friend Mindy Kaling, who accidentally called her âMeghan Markleâ in an episode of her Netflix show. âYou know Iâm Sussex now,â she purred, with all the warmth of a tiger about to sever its preyâs jugular.
For two people desperate to shrug off the mantle of royal life, Meghan and Harry seem to be very closely wrapped up in it. But in a way, itâs not the Duchess I blame the most. At the end of the day, itâs not her family sheâs exploiting (not that sheâs much kinder to them). Itâs Prince Harryâs. The fact that he seems neither to mind nor want to do anything about it is telling. Itâs either an indication of who wears the trousers in that relationship or proof that he really couldnât care less about the wishes of his late grandmother â a woman without whom, letâs face it, he would be just another balding middle-aged man.
Prince Harry owes everything he has â from the ring on his wifeâs finger to his beloved Invictus Games â to his Royal roots. He may not like it, but itâs the truth (in fact, would Meghan Markle, as she then was, even have given him a second glance had he not been a prince?).
The late Queen asked just one thing of him. Would it kill him, just for once in his life, to show some respect for her memory?
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